Question:
I am pleased to say that after 7+ months of nonsense (and a lawyer who was too busy to file in a timely manner) and 3 recent bounce-backs of the paperwork because of clerical errors— it is done!!! To those in Suffolk Cty. NY who I have griped to recently, the system is slooooooow but it works. Now hopefully dingbat will leave me alone… He is playing games, most recently calling every time the paperwork was bounced (almost gloating that my atty. screwed up) and trying to get me to move it Upstate where the courts aren’t backed up. I realized his game was to change the plaintiff name. He (via parents) has residency up there, not me. I think I would have to live there to file there. In any case, the new phase begins… his family I am sure is going to want him to pursue a Catholic annulment. those who may know): if bozo wants to do this does he have to drag my name through the proverbial mud? I had ground to divorce him but chose not to go that route since I didn’t want to drag *him* through the mud and embarass him. The ground in this case were "constructive abandonment", but I could have used emotional cruelty. NY still didn’t get no-fault back, supposedly next year. Well, I am thinking that his game to get me to change plaintiffs and all was to cement his annulment case, as he in the past couple of months became very eager to finalize the divorce. Time will tell… Kim
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I am pleased to say that after 7+ months of nonsense (and a lawyer who was too busy to file in a timely manner) and 3 recent bounce-backs of the paperwork because of clerical errors— it is done!!! To those in Suffolk Cty. NY who I have griped to recently, the system is slooooooow but it works. Now hopefully dingbat will leave me alone… He is playing games, most recently calling every time the paperwork was bounced (almost gloating that my atty. screwed up) and trying to get me to move it Upstate where the courts aren’t backed up. I realized his game was to change the plaintiff name. He (via parents) has residency up there, not me. I think I would have to live there to file there. In any case, the new phase begins… his family I am sure is going to want him to pursue a Catholic annulment. those who may know): if bozo wants to do this does he have to drag my name through the proverbial mud? I had ground to divorce him but chose not to go that route since I didn’t want to drag *him* through the mud and embarass him. The ground in this case were "constructive abandonment", but I could have used emotional cruelty. NY still didn’t get no-fault back, supposedly next year. Well, I am thinking that his game to get me to change plaintiffs and all was to cement his annulment case, as he in the past couple of months became very eager to finalize the divorce. Time will tell… Kim
Not so simple. A Catholic Anullment is only granted on very specific grounds. Specifically, the church does not get rid of valid marriages. They make a declaration that there never WAS a marriage. Therefore, what is examined is the intent and state of mind of the parties AT THE TIME THEY WERE MARRIED. You do NOT have to cooperate with him. If you don’t it makes it MUCH tougher for him to get the annullment, but its not impossible. Roughly half of all requested annullments are denied. Second, its not expensive – about $600 – and the cost falls on the person who requests it. If that person can’t afford it, they can petition the Church to waive part or all of the cost, and if there is truly hardship, they will. I am a practicing Roman Catholic and have discussed these topics in great length (for obvious personal reasons) with the Archdiocese. If you want to know more just ask (you’ll have to get through my spam filters; the first message you send will get bounced with instructions on how to do so) — — I ain’t even *authorized* to speak for anyone other than myself, so give up now on trying to associate my words with any particular organization.
Response:
Not so simple. A Catholic Anullment is only granted on very specific grounds. Specifically, the church does not get rid of valid marriages. They make a declaration that there never WAS a marriage. Therefore, what is examined is the intent and state of mind of the parties AT THE TIME THEY WERE MARRIED. You do NOT have to cooperate with him. If you don’t it makes it MUCH tougher for him to get the annullment, but its not impossible. Roughly half of all requested annullments are denied.
Well, doofy boy called me at work yesterday to tell me that the divirce went through last week. Hello??? I was suing *him* for crying out loud, and this really annoyed me since I was working late, technically not "there" so he was trying to track me down to tell me this (as he did with every other phase). I told him that I already knew last week! That shut him up… then he brought up the annulment issue again. Will I "go in with him on it?" — And I said "no."!!!! I do not want any more contact wih him, I want closure. The fact that he felt he needed to call and keep me up to date about the divorce I filed myself is bothersome enough- I have e-mail, he preferred to harass me on the phone with this minutia. Let him try and get an annulment. Let him fail miserably — ! Kim
Response:
Well, I am thinking that his game to get me to change plaintiffs and all was to cement his annulment case, as he in the past couple of months became very eager to finalize the divorce.
I know this is kind of late <but I’ve been up to my a** in boxes and moving stuff lately but your civil divorce will have no affect on the annulment process. Others have already pointed out the difference and the main difference is that there has to have been a problem with the marriage *at the time of the marriage.* Basically what happens *during* the marriage makes little difference. And it has also been pointed out that at least half (I seem to remember the percentage being more like 75 or 80%) of annulments applied for are not granted. Tracey <whose husband’s ex-wife did not get the annulment she wanted
Response:
Some of that depends what diocese you belong to… I’m sorry to hear you didn not get your annulment, but I bet you didn’t sleep with your husband’s best man because you were in love with him the whole time and made out on your front steps on your wedding night… Ooops, sorry. Did I say that out loud or just think it? Guess it’s not hard to tell who the bitter guy is… ;O) – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Tracey <whose husband’s ex-wife did not get the annulment she wanted
Response:
I’m sorry to hear you didn not get your annulment,
Uhm, a misunderstanding. I am currently married. My husband’s first wife applied for an annulment last summer. It was denied. I don’t remember exactly what my post said, but I seem to remember it was just a reiteration that more annulments are NOT granted than are. Tracey
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